Loose Slag from The Still Mill (June 14th, 2004)�

Some loose slag to chew on during this incredibly dull period of lousy Bucco baseball, no football, no hockey, and (yawn) the NBA Finals�..

- As some have noted, the revamping of the Mommy Maddox contract was the opening of a rotten can of worms�.a move that has several second and third order effects.� We�ve seen the first domino fall, that being Hines Ward�s legitimate displeasure of being so lowly paid despite being 1 of the AFC�s 2 or 3 best receivers.� The asininity of the Maddox revamp, is that the team just invested the 11th pick -- and soon to be tens of millions -- on QB Ben Roethlisberger.� That accomplished, the team needs absolutely nothing from Maddox after 2004.� NOTHING.� This isn�t the case of trying to placate a Plex Burress, or a Farrior or Bell (2 men who will be UFAs come March).� Once the 2004 season ends, the QB job immediately goes to Roth, and then any veteran journeyman -- it matters little who it actually is -- will be the 2nd stringer.�� Why the Stillers caved in to placate an insurance salesman is stuff for Rod Serling and The Twilight Zone, but it made no good sense whatsoever.� And now the Stillers will pay for it with rants and demands from other veterans who have far exceeded Mommy Maddox�s production and effectiveness.� The slippery slope has now been stumbled upon, and the ramifications are justifiably forthcoming.����

- Speaking of Hines Ward, I ran into him today and chatted.� I asked Ward if he planned on being in camp on time, and he chuckled good-naturedly and stated , �Aw, don�t worry�..everything will work out all right.�� Of course, it won�t be Ward who will be pounding on Rooney�s desk for more money.� It�ll be Ward�s agent, a guy who is not only paid to pound on desks, but also is a guy that receives a percentage of every dollar that he obtains for his client.� As an aside, I�d never seen Hinesy in street clothes up close.�� I�m 5-10, 187 pounds�.and Ward is literally my size�maybe he�s got another 10 pounds of muscle, but no more.� I�m utterly amazed how this guy takes the pounding he does�and still comes back for more.�

- With Plex�s mini-camp holdout and now Ward�s outspoken concern about his contract, there�s a bit of dissension in StillerLand that hasn�t been present in quite some time.� Some will lament this dissension and claim it�s bad for the team.� That�s hogwash.� It�s only bad if the dimbulbed head-coach -- you know, the pompous simpleton that makes over $3M per year -- allows it to have a negative effect.� Frankly, I�d prefer to see more emotion, more attitude, more anger, more stirring of the pot.� This collection of players has been far too vanilla, far too complacent, and far too polite to ever compete for a championship.� Give me some of the attitude and dissension created by the likes of Matt Millen, Shannon Sharpe, and Bill Romanowski -- all of whom happen to be in possession of very large, very expensive Super Bowl championship rings.�

- A recent article in one of the Pittsburgh papers lauded the Stillers new speedwork workouts.� Then the article stated what was more obvious than the splotch on Gorbachov�s head:� everybody and his brother had been doing this stuff for years, long before Neanderthal Billy Cowher decided to institute it for the Stillers.� In fact, the article stated that the Pitt Panthers -- the very team that shares the UPMC practice facility with the Stillers -- had been doing this type of work that past couple of years.� It�s always nice to know that your pro team -- �led� by a $3M head coach -- is on the cutting edge of innovation.�

- By the way, has anyone heard from Big Jason GilDong�.?�� Last we heard of The Gimcrack, his agent was proclaiming how a long list of teams was interested in signing The Dong.� Funny thing -- that was about 2 weeks ago, and the vaunted he-man hasn�t even sniffed a contract offer from a single team.� Gee, for being Peter King�s �#1 Available Free Agent�, Big Jason seems to be as popular as a street whore at a PTA convention.� It�s hilarious to hearken back to February of 2002, when imbecilic Steeler fans, along with the Stiller front office, jumped at Dom Caper�s now famous line of, �We MIGHT have some interest in Jason Gildon if he becomes a free agent.��� Just because somebody made a weak claim, then suddenly it was utter fact.� Quick -- a buddy of mine said that Enron stock is making a huge comeback.� Like the Stillers, don�t do any research or make any sound judgment -- rather, just rush out pell-mell and buy gobs of Enron stock, all because some guy SAID so.� Few things in life are more hilarious than watching someone blindly rush out like a complete jackass, all because someone �said so�.��

�- Antonio Bryant had the highly publicized spat with Bill Parcells.� If Kevin Colbert was worth a rat�s ass -- and that�s highly dubious -- he�d have been speed-dialing Cryboy headquarters day and night to obtain Bryant in a trade.� Bryant is an immense talent, and there�s no better time to acquire a player than when his head coach is raving mad at him. �Bryant would give the Stillers some cushion when Plex departs, and in the meantime, Bryant would give the Stillers a legitimate threat as a #3 receiver.�� Randle El is a nice threat in the punt return game and with the occasional gimmick, but his paltry 10 yards/reception and lowly TD reception number ain�t a threat at all in the passing game.� Lest I forget, the Stillers got virtually nothing out of their #4 receiver in �03.� Ergo, the acquisition of Bryant makes incredible sense from every angle that one looks at�.which is exactly why the Stillers won�t make such a move.�

- Hey, didn�t you used to be�..Big Jason GilDong, the feared, vaunted sack monger and bullrusher�?�� Hold your laughter, please.�

- The Pittsburgh� media is still carping and whining about �the wet fields last summer, which bogged down training camp.�� I�d forgotten that it never, ever rained in Philadelphia, Boston, Baltimore, Cleveland, Cinci, or Washington, D.C.� No siree -- apparently, the only place it rained on the entire east coast last summer was in the small town of Latrobe, PA.�

- I said it in my post-draft report, and I�ll say it again:� only a gullible buffoon -- in other words, the same type of simpleton that believed Dom Capers when he claimed �interest in Jason Gildon� -- would believe that Ben Roth will be signed and present at St. Vincent�s for the opening of camp.� Rooney will collapse in his chair from disbelief when Roth�s agent tosses the first demand of a $10M signing bonus onto the desk.� The Stillers have been blessed -- by planned design, quite obviously -- the past several seasons with the drafting of offensive linemen, a nose tackle, and a safety in round 1.� Drafting a high profile QB in round 1 requires millions in up-front cash, and you can bet the deceased Rooneys will be rolling in the graves over the largess of Roth�s contract.� At any rate, even Jason GilDong will be signed to an NFL contract before Ben Roth will.�

� - Maybe I shouldn�t roll with laughter at the NFL�s collective disinterest in The Gilded Dong.� If The Sorry Sack o� Dong isn�t signed, Billy Cowher might sign him as a late signee.� There�s absolutely nothing that could be more detrimental to this team, than bringing back Jason GilDong.� This being an undeniable fact, it�s entirely plausible that we here at Stillers.com need to remove The GilDong Report from this site.� The GilDong Report is nationally known, and perhaps some hard-working GMs have taken it upon themselves to see what a pure fraud Jason truly is by reading The Report.� Rest assured, we�ll monitor the situation, and if need be, we�ll have Trenches remove The Report until Jason is signed by another team.���

- There are numerous BIG questions that are being bandied about before camp opens.� For example, who will start at RT?�� Who will start at CB opposite Chad Scott?� Who backs up Maddox?�� These are all solid queries, but bigger game needs to be hunted.� The biggest question, from my perspective, is:� which movie will Billy Cowher take the team to see when the rigors of camp get to be too tough?�� Vin Diesel�s new movie looks like a promising bet, although it may be old hat by the time camp starts.� Ditto for Shrek 2, although it is aligned perfectly with Billy Cowher�s mental capacity.� At any rate, if I�m a Pittsburgh Stiller, I�m going to camp ready and raring to hit the air-conditioned movie theater at the earliest opportunity.� When the going gets tough, the Cowher-led Stillers head to the movie theater.�

(Still Mill and Stillers.com -- the only nationally read coverage on the Pittsburgh Stillers that has accurately predicted the how's and the why's of the past 3 Stiller playoff losses�.)