The Gildong Report
In light of many a fan being bamboozled and ga-ga over Jason Gildong�s 11 sacks last season --- despite only 2 being anywhere near "earned sacks" --- I'm devoting some time this season to monitor the work of the exceptionally average Jason Gildon. Jason has been famous enough with his coverage sacks, flop sacks, the QB-slipped-on-the-wet-turf sacks, the OT totally forgot his blocking assignment sacks, and so on, that the NFL has designated a new statistic, called the "Dong Sack™", in honor of Jason Gildong. (Some fantasy football leagues are incorporating this into their point systems.)
This week's report is the easiest for me to compile this season. What Gildon accomplished on Sunday is between the dotted lines:
Gildong did NOTHING on Sunday. I mean NOTHING. Gildong, a man supposedly having "an all pro season", was on the field for every defensive play versus the Titans --- 58, to be exact. And in those 58 plays, he did NOTHING. He registered 0 tackles, 0 assists, 0 pressures, 0 passes defended, 0 hits on ballcarriers, and 0 hits on blockers. ZERO. The EMPTY SET. Zippo. Nada.
I thought it would be interesting --- especially since Gildong did NOTHING and the write-up is so easy --- to provide some other opinions on Gildong's play Sunday.
Dave Ailes of the Trib had this to say: "�although one of the unit's leaders, Jason Gildon, was invisible against the Titans. Gildon not only didn't sack McNair, he didn't get close. Gildon's name didn't even appear on the stat sheet."
Here's some input from a keen observer I know in the midwest, who wrote me soon after the game ended and before any stats had been published:
"TO ALL THE GILDON LOVERS OUT THERE:
Each year, I choose one game to do nothing but isolate on Jason Gildon, just to clarify in my own mind an honest evaluation of what he does. Last year, it was the Tampa game, where Dungy had no one block him on running plays, cause there's no need to.
Today, if Jason was credited with even one tackle, then someone lied!!!
He had no tackles, but what's worse, he avoided contact the ENTIRE game. I'm dead serious, he AVOIDED CONTACT. There is no more disrespectful measure of a football player than one who avoids contact at all costs. He is a PURE P*SSY. Period. Plain and simple. I will give anyone ten bucks if they can produce 1 film clip of Jason Gildon delivering a blow of any kind in today's game. He should be embarrassed and ashamed, and should give his paycheck back."
In case yunz think I didn't personally do my homework; I did. I easily noticed Gildong's conspicuous absence during the game. On Monday nite, I scoured the film and watched him on every play. It was downright sickening. It's bad enough when a LB in a 3-4 defense fails to make even ONE tackle in a game of 58 plays. What was more nauseating, was the fact the Gildong was literally SHYING AWAY FROM CONTACT the entire game. The very 1st play from scrimmage, TE Harris blasted Gildong 3 yards off the ball during a George run up right tackle, and then Gildong inexplicably pirouetted and ran AWAY from the line of scrimmage a few more yards. This kind of softee played continued the whole game. The Titans often assigned just a solo FB or a solo TE to block The Dong on running plays, and they were continually driving him waaaay off the ball. Gildon looked like he was wearing roller blades, as he was doing NOTHING to stand up the blocker and hold his ground. And, on several occasions, the Titans simply assigned NO ONE to block Gildon. No one. And rushing the passer?? Fuhgetaboutit. Gildon softly titty-fought the offensive linemen, and never once surged within NBA-three-point range of Steve McNair. On top of this, Gildong had several opportunities to "chip in" on tackles near the end of runs & receptions, but he CLEARLY and CONTINUALLY pulled up, stuttered, and shied away from contact.
This unquestionably was one of the biggest carrot-waxing efforts by ANY linebacker in the past 5 years. And I am not exaggerating. There should NEVER be any more bullshot drivel mentioning the words Gildon & Pro Bowl in the same sentence, unless it somehow involves Jason holding the headset wires for Jim Mora or Gildong handing out Gatorade in the hot Hawaii sun.
Ironically enough, we did get to watch some REAL linebacker-type play on Sunday. Rookie Jevon Kearse continually showed that he has 3 times the skill of Emmons and Gildong COMBINED. Kearse created havoc all day, causing false starts, disrupting pass plays, and chasing down ballcarriers with the speed of a rabid leopard. Kearse even dropped back into coverage, showing that he can do anything and everything that an OLB in the 3-4 defense is SUPPOSED to do. Someone I know mentioned Kearse's miss of Stew on the one scramble. Apparently, he failed to see the SPEED at which Kearse was coming. Kearse was flying at the speed of light, and had he made contact, Stewart would have spent a week at a local hospital. Compare this to the Pitter Pat Brothers, Emmons & Gildong, who think that "full speed" means briskly strolling thru an intersection when the "Don't Walk" light is flashing. The play Kearse made to tackle Ward on the screen play was unreal. Kearse rushed, and the screen to Ward took place BEHIND Kearse. Quick as a tiger, Kearse reversed himself, and chased down Ward in a hungry, swooping effort that neither Emmons nor Gildong could have made if they tried it 800 times. And, Kearse did what I have consistently stated is FAR more important than slop sacks --- he harassed the QB and totally disrupted plays. Time and time again, Kearse was blasting & flying in, harassing Stewart out of the pocket and disrupting his reads & rhythm. It got so bad, that a few times, we had to use TWO men (2 RBs or a RB & a TE) in our backfield during shotgun formations, just so we could keep Kearse at bay for a lil' while. That's IMPACT, folks. When you disrupt loads of plays, and when you cause an offense to withdraw a receiver to help block you, that's IMPACT. Getting an UNTOUCHED Dong Sack isn't impact at all; that's just an offense losing on just 1 play in which it took a calculated risk and left Gildong unblocked. I vehemently wrote all spring that THIS was the man we needed to draft. "Oh, no, he can't play in the 3-4", many said. Kearse showed today that he can play in the 3-4, the 4-3, the 5-3, the 6-2, and ANY other defense you can imagine. Kearse showed that it doesn't matter if he in down in a 3-point stance or in an "up" position. Kearse could sit on a barstool when the ball is being snapped, and STILL make waaaay more plays than a Jason Gildong or a Carlos Femmons.
All this, and Kearse was puking his guts out early in the game on the sideline. Perhaps while his offense was on the field, Kearse was watching Gildong, and he, too, got nauseated.
Along with last week's disgraceful, meek, half-hearted effort to stop Marc Edwards from scoring a TD, I'm going to refer to this game to anyone who still believe in this ludicrous myth about Jason Gildong being a top-notch OLB.
Season to date totals for Jason:
Earned Sacks: 2
Dong Sacks™: 5.5
Strips, Jars, fumbles caused: 1
The Still Mill