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MILE HIGH SALUTE - Sports schtick or something sinister?

Postby HEINZsite » Mon Nov 09, 2009 4:13 pm

Amazingly, despite their unexpected start, there are still plenty of Bronco ‘fans’ bitching and moaning about Orton & company. Paleontologists in western Colorado have noted that some of the ‘Bronco-sore-ass’ fans have gone so far as to call for McDaniel’s head on a spit, while others have fanned the flames on the debate over the merits of his hiring this past summer. Some of the natives our indeed, restless.

Meanwhile, the overriding majority of fans really seemed to have bought in to their 6-1 start, while failing to see the game against Baltimore as the reality check that it most assuredly was. Despite missing this blatant midseason eye-opener, there are also a significant number of fans out there in Bronco-land, that have quietly been resurrecting the infamous ‘Mile High Salute’. You know the one, it was popularized by Shannon ‘Marble Mouth’ Sharpe, Terrell Davis, and God knows who the hell else back in the late 1990’s, presumably during the Super Bowl seasons of ’97 and ’98.

Incidentally, I don’t believe we ever saw Bubby Brister using that particular obscene gesture, but of course by that time in his career he had already led the league (multiple times) in spewing obscenities, and probably didn’t feel compelled to pad his stats any further. By the way, since I’ve already veered wildly off topic, let me add that there are rumors floating around the rarified air of Boulder County that suggest that Cutler left for Chicago, not because of salary squabbles or a personality conflict with Pat Bowlen or coach Josh ‘McGenius’ (as some like to call him), but something for more incredulous. If you believe the scuttlebutt, it seems that Cutler had the audacity to consider that there was only room for one number ‘6’ on the Broncos Ring of Fame, and that the honor could only be bestowed upon ex-Steeler Bubby Brister. It seems Jay-C was already assuming that he was destined to have a stellar, if not notable NFL career, and was plotting his course accordingly. This rumor was allegedly instigated, substantiated (or possibly fabricated) during a twittering session by none other than former Denver beat reporter; Adam Schefter. Obviously this never made the air on the NFL Channel or any other media outlet, and Schefter was unavailable for comment, the @#&$# SOB!

In any event, what is most disturbing, is that the success of the Broncos in 2009 has given a rebirth of sorts to the ‘Mile High Salute’. This in itself is no big deal, even expected, but this situation has been made exponentially worse by a little known, and scarcely reported, amendment to the National Defense Authorization Act of 2009. Never heard of this? No worries, you’re not alone.

The National Defense Authorization Act, according to Wikipedia, is the name of a United States federal law that is enacted each fiscal year to specify the budget and expenditures of the Department of Defense (DoD). What does this have to do with football? Well, this recent and somewhat obscure amendment to the Act was the subject of a short article which appeared last month on the Department Of Defense (DoD) sponsored website;
The ramifications of the amendment and subsequent article, especially if it were to be actually read, fully appreciated, and enacted upon by our sports-crazed nation, could radically change the face of sport from the perspective of the spectator.

The article is titled “Retirees and Veterans Allowed to Salute Flag” and states:

Traditionally, members of the nation's veterans service organizations have rendered the hand-salute during the national anthem and at events involving the national flag only while wearing their organization's official head-gear. The National Defense Authorization Act of 2008 contained an amendment to allow un-uniformed service members, military retirees, and veterans to render a hand salute during the hoisting, lowering, or passing of the U.S. flag. A later amendment further authorized hand-salutes during the national anthem by veterans and out-of-uniform military personnel. This was included in the Defense Authorization Act of 2009, which President Bush signed on Oct. 14, 2008.[/i]

Think about this for a second. The amendment states, ‘…[i]veterans and out-of-uniform military personnel’
. Are they out-of-their minds?! In practice, Joe ‘Six-Pack’, having consumed numbers seven, eight and nine, can now render a sloppy half-assed hand salute during the national anthem if he successfully offloaded those beers in a toilet, urinal, or sink of his choosing, and actually made it to his seat prior to kickoff. More specifically, Bronco fans can use this as an opportunity to flaunt their Mile High Salute with impunity. Keep in mind that veterans are essentially indistinguishable from any other schmuck in the stands. So really, anyone over the age of 18 can participate in this good intentioned piece of legislation. After all, who’s going to enforce this, the hotdog vendors?

Maybe I’m getting all wound up for nothing, but I couldn’t stop thinking about this in the context of the throngs of Bronco fans expected to be at INVESCO Field tonight. I have visions of their fans all rendering a hand-salute to the flag to be sure, but also simultaneously pledging allegiance to the Bronco nation. Forget about Francis Scott Key, this would surely look like a Joe Francis production called, “Mile High Salute Gone Wild”. I swear, the defamation of the Terrible Towel was bad, the perversion of those few minutes before the opening kickoff would be far worse. Superstitions and curses are one thing, the very real potential of desecrating the flag is something entirely different.

I don’t fear the Broncos tonight, but I am afraid that Denver’s Mile High Salute will go down in the annuls of sports superstitions, curses, and schticks as something far more sinister. If these fears are realized, the Denver Broncos would share a dubious distinction with the Atlanta Braves, who as we all know, have already distorted the final verse of the national anthem…

“O'er the land of the free and the home of the Braves!”

…I swear it can happen.

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Re: MILE HIGH SALUTE - Sports schtick or something sinister?

Postby steelcitymetal » Mon Nov 09, 2009 9:42 pm

i tried to read all of that, but i just don't give a shit


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