Tiny
Tim Reveals how to Roast his defense
Said
Tiny Tim Lewis in the Trib
Review on Monday:
"The
fact of the matter is, like I told you guys earlier in the year, if a team were
to come out and play us in a two-back set, a two-tight end set and try to make
that their bread and butter, like the last two teams have, we match up pretty
well against them," Lewis said.
"They
made a mistake," Lewis said. "They played right into our hands. If
you're going to line up with a tight end and two running backs on our defense,
you're asking for a 47-yard day."
On the one hand, Tiny Tim is a mutineer for giving away the secrets on how to torpedo his own team. On the other hand, Timmy isn't revealing anything less obvious than a cockroach on a billiard table. The entire NFL knows that ya don't beat Neanderthal Bill with Neanderthal football. Ya beat the Cro Magnon dullard, Billy Cowher, by exploiting his ill-prepared, vanilla-laden team with clever use of an Alrfed Papunu. You beat the dimbulbed Cowher by getting matchups like David Patten versus Jason GilDong. You beat Billy Cowher with Shannon Sharpe on Jason GilDong on a late 3d & 8, despite the preparation allotted from a 2-minute warning.� You beat the scared, turtling Cro Magnon by seizing the initiative at every turn, while the Turtle King "plays it safe" and "hopes to keep the game close in the 4th quarter."� You beat Billy Cowher by watching him start a scatback and sticking with him for over 20 minutes on a soupy, slop-laden field, while the big bruising back, Bam Morris, rots on the bench. You beat Neanderthal Bill by seizing the lead in the first half, and then watch Cowher and company gasp and wheeze for air as they choke the game away.�
Houston and
Carolina -- the very two worst offenses in pro football -- simply don't
have the talent or the bodies to spread the field and slice & dice Cowher
and Tiny Tim.� Problem is, most of the
teams in the playoffs have considerably more talent and depth than lowly
Carolina and Houston.� It's not likely
that any playoff team will play into the hands of the Neanderthal Man by
playing Neanderthal football.� Cheezy
wins over regular season cheese puffs are nice for padding the record, but do
little to prepare a team for the rigors of the playoffs.� Cowher prefers cheese, but like his
gameplans and his approach to player conditioning, there's too much fat and not
enough substance.�