Chefs 36, Stillers 10....... Dec 26, 2021 …………Game # 15
Stillers-Chefs Postgame Analysis and Grades
The 7-6-1 Stillers mosied out to Arrowhead for a must-win tilt versus the 10-4 Chefs. Before ya knew it, the Chefs were up 14-0, and quickly after that, it was 23-0. The game devolved into a complete blowlout by midway thru the 3Q. I’ll put the same effort into this game as this sorry-assed quad gave during the contest.
QB: Ben had a shaggy, raggedy game.
Opening series, had ALL day, and threw a lame pass 14 feet short of the receiver who was on a pattern 6 yards down the field. On 3D, had a decent amount of time, and then, with the mobility of a TV cart, was easily engulfed and sacked.
2d series – started with a putrid flea flicker pass by Ben that was easily INT’d. Per the CBS reporter, Shitlesberger came do the sideline and complained the ball drifted due to the wind. Oh, really? Mahomes took over and marched his team to a 2nd TD, and at that point was 10 of 12 passing. Why wasn’t the wind affecting Mahomes?
Shitlesberger took over late in the 2Q after a missed KC FG, down 23-0, at his own 29. Instead of taking some stabs DOWN the field, Shitlesberger turns into a chicken, scared to death Checkdown Charlie…..5 yard dumpoff to Harris, then a 10 yarder to Gentry. With 4 seconds left from his own 44, instead of flinging a Hail Mary and perhaps getting at least a DPI flag, Checkdown Charlie dumped it off to Harris….for a SIX yard gainer as the half expired. I’ve seen enough; time for Shitlesberger to retire.
As if all this wasn’t bad enough, in the 4Q Shilesberger got stripped of the ball as he meandered in the pocket on a fake, as slow as a 64-year old wearing ski boots, giving KC the ball on the PIT 7.
Time for Shitlesberger to retire, and fast. D
Harris – nice 21 yard run, mid 2Q. Had a couple other nice carries, along with a bevy of runs where he was swarmed within a second of getting the handoff. Had 19 carries for 93, plus 5 grabs for 17. B
McFarl – Sat out due to Covid.
Snell – got what was probably his most extensive PT of the season. Had 5 rushes for 20, plus 1 grab.
FB: Watt saw very little PT on O.
Wash – Saw very, very little PT, which was puzzling, as McLoud got at least 40 snaps on offense.
Dionte - stellar grab, 2nd play o’ game. Fumbled the ball, early 3Q, without getting hit, creating a ghastly turnover. Dropped a pass, 5:02 3Q, although KC was flagged for offsides on the play. Nifty move on the RAC to score a late TD. B-
Claypool – stellar grab, despite a bobble, of a skinny post, mid 2Q. Immediately followed that with a terrific grab of a back shoulder pass, next play. Had 4 grabs for 41. B
GayRay McCloud – grabbed a quick hitch, and was laughingly dropped for a 3 yard loss. Clumsily dropped a short pass a few plays later. Flagged for a silly, needless taunting penalty – down by THIRTY points, no less – at 5:00 3Q. C-
Pat FryBoy – sat out due to the concussion from last week.
Gentry – got the start at TE due to FryBoy’s concussion. Had 4 grabs, which is likely a career high.
OL: Overall, the line had a variety of struggles, particularly in the 1H when the running game could barely do shit.
KenDick Green was flagged for a hold on a 7 yard run by Snell that would have moved the chains. What made the flag so exasperating was that the RB was essentially BEYOND the defender when the needless hold occurred. Leglue was flagged for a false start on a 4th & 10 from the KC 11, late in the 3Q, forcing a FG.
Heyward – The $65M Man had yet another ho-hum game in which he did very, very little.
On 3d & 11, first drive, he foolishly went offsides. On the ensuing play, KC gained 5 to make it a 4th & 1, which KC easily converted for a 1st down to the 1. Two plays later, KC scored on a short run, all thanks to The Scammer, Scam Heyward.
At 1:39 3Q, Scam came off the ball, UNTOUCHED and unblocked, from the PIT right, as Gore ran to his right/Steeler left. Scam had a clean shot at the RB, but slimily just stumbled and flailed as the RB cruised on for a 7 yard gainer. Got an entirely meaningless Dong Sack, early 4Q, when Mahomes was flushed from the pocket and Scam was standing around to pick up the garbage. This whopping 4 yard loss, on 3d & 9 from the PIT 16, forced a FG that made the score 33-3. The Scammer finished with 3 solo tackles and very, very little impact whatsoever. D+
Tuitt – another vaunted DE who missed his 15th game of the year, stealing a full paycheck all the while. What a fuking crock. F
Wormley – missed the game due to Covid.
Loudermilk – good stop, first play of game. Good run stop, early 3Q; and injured Edwards-Hellaire in the process with a legal, rugged tackle. Had 3 solos and 3 As, which begs the question – why had he been benchrotting the entire season while the rest of the D-line has played like ass ? A-
Adams – flagged for offsides, 1Q.
Mondeux – did next to nothing. C-
Bush – missed the game due to Covid. The KC coaching staff was, of course, rather miffed and angry.
Schobert – did very little to thwart the run. C-
Watt – On KC’s 2nd drive, which resulted in a TD, Sitter Watt was all pooped out and standing on the sideline after the 2nd play of that march. Ended the half with 1 solo, and ended the game with the 1 measly solo. He’s just…..so…..vaunted….! D
Highsmith – chipped in with Spillane on the early TD, clumsily failing to grasp and corral Edwards-Hellaire. Stripped the ball from the QB, 1Q, but the ball popped into the hands of an O-lineman. Had 2 solos and 4As, but not nearly enough. C
Spillane – Had RB Edwards-Hellaire dead to rights on a plunge from the 1 yard line, but clumsily allowed the RB to slip from his grasp and walk into the EZ for a TD. Did little to stop the ground gashing. C+
Marc Allen – missed the game due to Covid.
Mel Ingram – isn’t it splendid how Stoogelin ran this fellow off, and now has ZERO depth at OLB ??
Haden – played lots of soft coverage and allowed some easy completions.
Cam Sutton - Got torched for the 2nd KC TD. Weakly just WAIVED at the WR after the grab, who then jogged into the EZ to make the score 30-0. C
Norwood – saw only bit playing time.
Edmunds - Brilliant (sic) play by Terrell Edmunds, drifting out of bounds without even getting a pinkie on the WR, who was just an INCH from the sideline chalk, who then walked into the EZ for a cakewalk TD. Edmunds, who sucks like an angry elephant. 23-0, Chefs. This very play is the prime example why ya DO NOT sign/retain this sorry-ass after the season. D
Minkah - raked the ball loose from the WR, 2d series. Lazily just pawed at the WR and whiffed, allowing the TD to make the score 30-0. Was very active, with 5 solos and 7 As. B-
Pierre – thankfully didn’t play on D.
‘Spoon – after a KC receiver DROPPED a TD pass, Spoon pranced and preened…..while the team was down 23-0 late in the 2Q. What a tool.
Harvin– was inactive, due to the death of his father. Doing the punting chores was Corlis Waitman. He boomed his first punt 63 yards, but it took a huge roll and went into the EZ. Had 2 punts for a 60 yard average. I’d keep him on the roster and “start” him next week. Looks like Harvin had grown far too complacent.
Boswell – 1 for 2 on FGs. Hooked a 36 yard FG, 2Q, with the team down 17-0 and desperate for a few points. C+
RayRay – mostly awful on KO returns. Had a half decent punt return.
OC: Matt Canada again “led” a moribund offense that couldn’t do jack squat the entire 1H.
The 2nd series started immediately with a flea flicker, which fooled…..exactly NOBODY ! The running game had, at that point, 2 rushes for NEGATIVE yardage….so where in the fuk did Canada think KC was going to be rabidly BITING UP on the flea flicker ?? The result was an INT. and soon enough, KC was in front 14-0.
3d & 10, from the KC 18 in the 2Q, and Canada orders a bubble screen to a split-wide Harris, who was engulfed for no gain.
4th & 1, late 2Q, and Canda calls for a power pitch to Harris, the same play that opened the game with a 1 yard loss. Sure as shit, there were FOUR defenders waiting for Harris, who was engulfed for a 3 yard loss.
This offense is complete garbage, and Canada warrants considerable blame. D-
Keith Assler had the luxury of facing a Chef offense without TE Travis Kelce, and a rusty Tyreek Hill, who hadn’t practiced all week due to Covid protocol. Of course, it mattered little, as KC gouged and gashed Assler as easy as pie.
On their first drive, sure as shit, Assler allowed the Chefs to march….and march….and march, going 73 yards on 14 plays and chewing up 8:10 of clock for a cake-walk TD.
The next series, KC marched, easy as pie, 49 yards for another TD, making it 14-0.
A miracle.... Keith Assler didn't allow KC a TD on the 3rd drive. Of course, KC marched 54 yards and chewed over 5:00 of clock en route to a FG that made the score 17-0.
KC had its way with Assler’s Softee Defense well thru the 3rd quarter, before putting on the brakes and feeling sorry in the 4Q. It was a grisly, embarrassing gashing. F
HC: Mike Asslin talked all sorts of bravado coming into this game, about how the team needed to be “ready from the start” and to “avoid getting into a deep hole”. Sure as a bear shits in the woods, the deep hole is precisely what Asslin’s ill-prepared team got into. The offense sputtered right from the get-go, while the Softee Defense again got gashed early and often, allowing the Chefs to do anything and everything they wanted. As if this wasn’t bad enough, the team QUIT midway thru the 3rd quarter. And there was also the foolish jack-assery, such as the taunting penalty by McLloud while down by a half-zillion points, and Witherspoon preening and prancing while down by 23. The asininity has happened ALL season long, and Stoogelin has tacitly condoned it. It all starts at the top, and at the top of this team is a clueless, feckless coach who has completely lost his limited ability to lead this team. Time for Mike Asslin to move on to his life’s work, and quickly. F
Synopsis: Just another grisly ass-beating, the latest in a grim string of beatings since the gaudy 4-game winning streak in Oct/Nov. Playoffs……?? Ha ! With this putrid, sorry-assed team, no can do. The best thing this slackly team can do is lose out, and obtain the best draft spot they can.
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